[ Ten years ago it would've been some kind of telling if Joseph had...confessed this to Seb. And he would've taken it in confidence and never told a soul. But all the same, from his deeply private partner, Sebastian hadn't even considered that this was something that would be eating at the man. ]
It's not like you had a good reason to tell me, right? I'm not upset. I'm— [ Not surprised, not upset, not confused, well, a little confused why this is what's been eating Joseph alive specifically— ] —Sorry this is why we're talking about it.
[ "This" being a fucking drugged up orgy of a party he barely remembers arriving to. He reaches up to scratch the back of his neck, awkwardness and a phantom itch alike sparking the gesture as he chuckles to himself. Charismatic. The fuck, Joseph, of all people, you're supposed to know what words mean... ]
I'd never really...thought about it before. [ And yeah, he looks incredibly awkward about that confession, and attempts to shrug it off. ] But I guess that's...out.
It's not as though I thought you'd be angry or disapproving, nothing like that. [Sebastian isn't that kind of person.] I really didn't have any reason. Let's face it... [He says flatly, with no shortage of wry self-deprecation.] It certainly wasn't about to come up with regards to my personal life...
[He ends up chuckling too, offering Sebastian an awkward little smile of his own at the pun.]
Friends for ten years, and there's still things left to learn about ourselves, huh?
[Now comes the absolutely crushing problem that Joseph has no idea where the conversation goes from here, or if he had any point in bringing it up apart from just clearing the air.]
[ There might not have been a point beyond “clearing the air” but if it means they can breathe a little easier around each other, it was worth it. This wasn't the only barrier between them, just... the most recent one, far as Seb can tell. At least it could be cleared up by talking about it. Eventually. It's worth the introspection to see Joseph smile like that, even if it's just a little.
There wasn't much distance between them to begin with, but he closes it to set his hand gently on Joseph's shoulder, squeezes it a little more firmly than necessary, but not maliciously, and doesn't pull his hand back immediately. ]
It's a good thing, right? Little mystery to keep things interesting.
[ Evidence for the existence of God presents itself in the next moment as Sebastian takes the breath to jokingly say something he'd deeply, deeply regret the instant it was aloud, and manages to realize it before doing so. Instead he just squeezes Joseph's shoulder again. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
It's not like you had a good reason to tell me, right? I'm not upset. I'm— [ Not surprised, not upset, not confused, well, a little confused why this is what's been eating Joseph alive specifically— ] —Sorry this is why we're talking about it.
[ "This" being a fucking drugged up orgy of a party he barely remembers arriving to. He reaches up to scratch the back of his neck, awkwardness and a phantom itch alike sparking the gesture as he chuckles to himself. Charismatic. The fuck, Joseph, of all people, you're supposed to know what words mean... ]
I'd never really...thought about it before. [ And yeah, he looks incredibly awkward about that confession, and attempts to shrug it off. ] But I guess that's...out.
no subject
[He ends up chuckling too, offering Sebastian an awkward little smile of his own at the pun.]
Friends for ten years, and there's still things left to learn about ourselves, huh?
[Now comes the absolutely crushing problem that Joseph has no idea where the conversation goes from here, or if he had any point in bringing it up apart from just clearing the air.]
no subject
There wasn't much distance between them to begin with, but he closes it to set his hand gently on Joseph's shoulder, squeezes it a little more firmly than necessary, but not maliciously, and doesn't pull his hand back immediately. ]
It's a good thing, right? Little mystery to keep things interesting.
[ Evidence for the existence of God presents itself in the next moment as Sebastian takes the breath to jokingly say something he'd deeply, deeply regret the instant it was aloud, and manages to realize it before doing so. Instead he just squeezes Joseph's shoulder again. ]
Come on. Let's get breakfast.